You have become the bully you so valiantly admonish!

Living in America, we are afforded certain inalienable rights. Freedom of speech is one of them. But in that freedom comes responsibility. Responsibility not to spew forth, hate, vitriol, falsehoods, or “Alternative Facts” as Facts. What I’m getting at is…what do you do to a child who outright lies to you, over and over again? Do you not correct their wrongdoings with some sort of consequence? Is there not a punishment for lying to a parent, guardian, or any other human being? If in fact the lie was outright egregious, then it should be handled as a lie, if however it was just misinformation or poor knowledge, it should also be handled accordingly as to rectify the wrongdoings.

Or am I wrong? Would you just continue to let your child lie to you and countless others, because it’s “Their Truth” ?

I doubt any good parent would knowingly allow their child to lie, without reprimanding them and teaching them the lessons of right and wrong. I’m reminded of the little story “The boy who cried wolf.” keep lying and no one will believe you when you’re really telling the truth. Eventually it happens, and when it does, I’m sure the circumstances are not idyllic.

I’ve seen much in the ways of propaganda, lies, and just outlandish juvenile behavior from people who I both admire, and associate with as friends, acquaintances, etc. I understand the right to have opposing opinions on various subjects, and I get a good meme from time to time is a quick way to show how you’re really feeling at the moment about a particular situation at hand, but come on people show a little decorum. Show a little respect. For yourselves.

When you are bashing the Woman’s March on DC, and posting a meme that says, “Get back in the kitchen where you belong, and make me a sandwich.”  “Trump got more than a million woman out exercising in one day than, Michelle Obama did in eight years” You are what’s wrong with this world. You are portraying nothing less than childish behavior at the expense at another human being. You are showing your children how to behave and act in this world, you are grooming our boys into men, and showing our girls where their place is in this world as well. Ultimatley you’re doing nothing to promote your cause.

You have become the Bully you so valiantly admonish! 

Think about that for a moment, and let it sink in.

By showing, or saying certain things, attacking groups of people, you are no better than the gum on the bottom of my shoe. And trust me I’m being kind by suggesting that.

You don’t need to be a feminist, to have compassion, dignity, and acceptance of others/things that are different from you. You have to be a human. Plain and simple it doesn’t get easier than that.

I have witnessed on my Facebook feed countless meme’s of hate and anger towards feminists, women in general, LGBTQ, African-Americans, etc and each and almost every one of those people who are posting, always have a savvy meme or copy and paste diatribe of words that they have scooped up from someone who is on a warpath. Hardly any of them have put into their own words what they really feel. Again I get the quick wit of just copying and sharing something that aligns with your thoughts and feelings, I’ve done it myself on occasion.

The most recent one I’ve seen circulating Facebook is one of  a particular status that expresses the reason why women did not support the marches.

First let me say, you don’t have to support the march, you should respect those that feel the need to march, however. You must realize that not everyone has the same advantages as you or I for that matter. We are afforded the right to peaceful protest under the US Constitution, we should take advantage of it. I’m not saying violence is acceptable, there is a distinct line between violent protests, and those that are peaceful. I support peaceful protests, even if I don’t participate with them, or feel they align with my values. Everyone is entitled to opinions, as you are entitled to not agree with the protests that have taken place, but to bash another person for feeling the need to stand up for what they believe is, is like telling you not to hold your beliefs true. Isn’t it?

I’m not sitting behind this monitor telling you your ideals are wrong. I don’t agree with you, but I’m not telling you you’re wrong, unless your promoting a lie.

Most of the women who are protesting are doing so because they have at one time or another felt disrespected, held down, belittled, abused, treated as second class citizens, etc. They feel at this point this is how to get their voices heard. And although we were heard in the election, our countries election process does not believe in popular vote. If you still believe that Hillary only won the popular vote because of illegal immigrant votes, I have a bridge to sell you.

You don’t have to agree with those that chose to march, you do however need to stop living a life of “I” and instead of stating…

I’m not disrespected

I’ve never felt that way before

I’ve never been abused

I don’t believe in their cause…

How about remove yourself from the equation, and think about THEM. Why are they doing what they are doing. I’m thrilled that You haven’t endured the atrocities that many of these women have faced, and are trying to prevent. I’m saddened by their experiences and the fact that this election has elicited such emotion from them that they are scared. Scared of what could happen, scared of what is happening slowly to our future. I’ve had my own share of problems in life, some that no one will ever know of, but when I hear and see things that so many people are saying it shakes me to my soul, because I know of what possiblilites stand on the other side of that door.

I don’t mind a world with varying opinions, I actually encourage thought-provoking, intelligent ones, but what I do mind is hate! Hate from people I call, friends, acquaintances, colleagues, family… it’s sickening, sad, and angers me.

Instead of bashing one another, or dismissing someones cause, how about you ask them why they are doing what they are doing. Ask them if you can help, even if in another way. You don’t need to stand with them in solidarity marching through the streets, but you should however offer a shoulder or a listening ear for their cause. If at the end of the conversation, you still can’t accept their ideas, wish them well… and walk away.

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Walking away isn’t bad, actually it’s quite acceptable, but be respectful. I understand that there is hate and negativity on both sides.  I remember the days of seeing memes referencing monkeys, and posts of violence against, President Obama, but of course many people tend to forget what has happened in the past. People who felt those posts were horrible are constantly told to “Buckle up butter cup. Stop being a snowflake. Go away and color. Find a safe place”  Those same people who were telling you were to go back then are at it now, but with a sense of power and authority behind them because “our guy won and your bitch lost” But remember this one thing, the past predicts the future, and our past is dark, we must do all we can to change the future, and the only way to change that is to change ourselves. Keep standing up for the truth.

If we constantly bash one another, even in a joking manner, it is still negative energy being let out into this glorious world we inhabit. Let us be better than our past, better than our worse selves, and better than someone who can not see past themselves.

Thank You, to the Honest Men in the Dating World!!

I’ve been wanting to write this post for a few weeks now, but it seems to have taken a back seat on my list. Between the snow storms, life in general and well with Valentines Day, and all those crazy thoughts swirling in my mind. So tonight’s the night I write my other thank you…

738685ce9fdf7dfdcd18e4f7e9d93858On the relationship roller-coaster of love, I’ve always said I prefer upfront honesty. I’d rather know sooner rather than later, that you’re not feeling it, rather than prolonging the inevitable, dragging something out that you truly have no interest in beyond the moment.

That’s not saying, you need to know you’re gonna marry each other the first date. I feel a first date isn’t really a date anyway, it’s a meet up (if we’re talking online dating especially), something to get over the cold feet, make sure you’re the people in the pictures. I know I am, are you?? There are times you might wish you could run out of a first date cause you know there is absolutely nothing there, but then there are those first ones that leave you wondering, hmm maybe there is something here but we’re both a little nervous or whatever the case is. So you give it another shot and take it from there. That’s how I like to do things.

What I am saying is this. If you’re not feeling something, or feeling something isn’t clicking, say something. It’s much better to get it out in the open and spare both parties the uncomfortableness of the inevitable, rather than drag it out for months because you worry how it will be received. Here’s a hint, the longer you wait, it probably wont turn out so good, at least I can only assume it wont turn out well for you.

♥ I appreciate the honesty.
♥ I welcome it with open arms.
♥ I gladly accept it.
♥ I value it.
♥ I will have more respect for you.

There’s a saying…”I’d rather you hurt me with the truth, than comfort me with a lie” (something like that) Yes, I might be hurt, BUT I wont hate you. You didn’t do anything wrong, you were honest. It’s better that way. I wish more guys were that way. Wishful thinking on my part I guess.

Wait a second, let me take that last part back.

I have been very lucky that there are guys out there that have the decency to be honest and upfront, I like to call them Men.

Yeah Men.

They’re not perfect, no one is. I’m sure as hell not. But I give them credit for being honest. Why am I giving them credit for something we ALL should strive for? Simply because, there are many, many times in life when we wait to long to say the important things. The guys that get this credit are the ones who know how to be honest, at the right time. Don’t wait a year to say you’re not feeling it, the spark isn’t there, something isn’t clicking, whatever it may be. It takes you that long to be able to say it? Something is wrong with you!

I also think it’s easier to just walk away from something rather than face it, because to many people, ok I’ll say it… women, would rather not know the truth. Seriously, the truth will set you free, both of you. Not saying the truth has to be mean and nasty, just be open and honest. I think this kind of thinking enables guys to not be that open and honest. But again what do I know. It’s only from my experiences. Specifically when some guys, after they bare the truth, are so shocked to see my response. They’ve yet to meet a woman who accepts the truth, and are even worried about expressing it. It’s easier for them to do the “fade away” whatever the hell that is. Or just make up an excuse. Ok I took a few internet searches after penning this post, to see what the “fade away” is all about. Basically it’s what it sounds like, a fading away of interaction. You just gradually, or all at once stop calling, texting etc.  (This I will say, maybe isn’t such a bad idea with respect to those really horrible dates that you wish you could fast forward time, or have an earthquake hit so you can leave. Reserve the fade away for critical times. But doing a fade away after months of dates, yeah you suck if you do that.)

I’ve had the open, honest, sooner rather than later guys, and the wait till it’s almost too late guys in my life. I prefer the former by leaps and bounds.

Be that guy!!

Yeah some women can’t accept the truth, and they never will be able to, but don’t let them rule how you live. You’d be surprised at how many more would respect you for the honesty. I do understand there are women out there who do the same thing, they suck just as much if they are dragging things out. That whole, well if they do it so can I mentality, isn’t really helping the dating “struggle”.

So I say… Thank You to the Men out there that are truthful, honest, and upfront. The world is a better place with you, at least I think so. These of course are just my opinions on this roller coaster of love.

Those are my Random Musings and Wanderlust for today 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.