I’ve been wanting to write this post for a few weeks now, but it seems to have taken a back seat on my list. Between the snow storms, life in general and well with Valentines Day, and all those crazy thoughts swirling in my mind. So
tonight’s the night I write my other thank you…
On the relationship roller-coaster of love, I’ve always said I prefer upfront honesty. I’d rather know sooner rather than later, that you’re not feeling it, rather than prolonging the inevitable, dragging something out that you truly have no interest in beyond the moment.
That’s not saying, you need to know you’re gonna marry each other the first date. I feel a first date isn’t really a date anyway, it’s a meet up (if we’re talking online dating especially), something to get over the cold feet, make sure you’re the people in the pictures. I know I am, are you?? There are times you might wish you could run out of a first date cause you know there is absolutely nothing there, but then there are those first ones that leave you wondering, hmm maybe there is something here but we’re both a little nervous or whatever the case is. So you give it another shot and take it from there. That’s how I like to do things.
What I am saying is this. If you’re not feeling something, or feeling something isn’t clicking, say something. It’s much better to get it out in the open and spare both parties the uncomfortableness of the inevitable, rather than drag it out for months because you worry how it will be received. Here’s a hint, the longer you wait, it probably wont turn out so good, at least I can only assume it wont turn out well for you.
♥ I appreciate the honesty.
♥ I welcome it with open arms.
♥ I gladly accept it.
♥ I value it.
♥ I will have more respect for you.
There’s a saying…”I’d rather you hurt me with the truth, than comfort me with a lie” (something like that) Yes, I might be hurt, BUT I wont hate you. You didn’t do anything wrong, you were honest. It’s better that way. I wish more guys were that way. Wishful thinking on my part I guess.
Wait a second, let me take that last part back.
I have been very lucky that there are guys out there that have the decency to be honest and upfront, I like to call them Men.
They’re not perfect, no one is. I’m sure as hell not. But I give them credit for being honest. Why am I giving them credit for something we ALL should strive for? Simply because, there are many, many times in life when we wait to long to say the important things. The guys that get this credit are the ones who know how to be honest, at the right time. Don’t wait a year to say you’re not feeling it, the spark isn’t there, something isn’t clicking, whatever it may be. It takes you that long to be able to say it? Something is wrong with you!
I also think it’s easier to just walk away from something rather than face it, because to many people, ok I’ll say it… women, would rather not know the truth. Seriously, the truth will set you free, both of you. Not saying the truth has to be mean and nasty, just be open and honest. I think this kind of thinking enables guys to not be that open and honest. But again what do I know. It’s only from my experiences. Specifically when some guys, after they bare the truth, are so shocked to see my response. They’ve yet to meet a woman who accepts the truth, and are even worried about expressing it. It’s easier for them to do the “fade away” whatever the hell that is. Or just make up an excuse. Ok I took a few internet searches after penning this post, to see what the “fade away” is all about. Basically it’s what it sounds like, a fading away of interaction. You just gradually, or all at once stop calling, texting etc. (This I will say, maybe isn’t such a bad idea with respect to those really horrible dates that you wish you could fast forward time, or have an earthquake hit so you can leave. Reserve the fade away for critical times. But doing a fade away after months of dates, yeah you suck if you do that.)
I’ve had the open, honest, sooner rather than later guys, and the wait till it’s almost too late guys in my life. I prefer the former by leaps and bounds.
Be that guy!!
Yeah some women can’t accept the truth, and they never will be able to, but don’t let them rule how you live. You’d be surprised at how many more would respect you for the honesty. I do understand there are women out there who do the same thing, they suck just as much if they are dragging things out. That whole, well if they do it so can I mentality, isn’t really helping the dating “struggle”.
So I say… Thank You to the Men out there that are truthful, honest, and upfront. The world is a better place with you, at least I think so. These of course are just my opinions on this roller coaster of love.
Those are my Random Musings and Wanderlust for today 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.