Cute, goatee, pink sake bottle drinking guy ;-)

So I’m out to dinner, alone. Not an uncommon thing. I usually enjoy it. It’s a comfortable place to be…usually. As I sit amongst the sea of coupledom, and beyond, I notice my uncomfortableness start to increase.

Is it gluten?

Did I eat something that’s not agreeing with me?

Is it hot in here?

No. It’s just me. Uncomfortable in a seemingly normal situation for myself.

I usually enjoy these moments of solitude. Today not so much. I can’t really explain what it is but it’s unsettling. Have I become less of that independent woman who enjoys doing things alone? Can’t put my finger on it. Maybe, just maybe it’s me.

As I take moments between sipping my miso soup, and gazing at the crowd… Yes, it’s totally me.

There’s a table, about 2-3 away from me, filled with three guys. The table separating us is empty, but most of the restaurant is full, except for a few random spots like this. They’re enjoying each others company, joking, laughing, eating, and drinking sake. Each time I look up from my phone, over the rim of my glasses, cute, goatee guy, with the seemingly frosted pink bottle of Bèni-Mansaku (just checked the menu for that one) keeps smiling.

He’s alone now, but keeps smiling.

Holy crap is he flirting?

Nah never happens and I sure as shit never notice it. It ALWAYS goes right over my head.

I’m the one who’s girlfriends tell her hours later a guy was flirting while out at the bar. I never pick up on this. So no it can’t be.

Maybe he has a nervous tick?

Maybe he feels bad for the girl out eating all alone?

Yeah that has to be it.

Thankful for my phone…because cute, goatee, pink sake bottle, drinking guy is making me blush. I’m actually afraid to make eye contact, or even let him notice that I notice him.

I’m like a freaking school girl!!

Ok channel your inner Taylor Swift and shake, shake, shake it off.

I know my friends would say “What are you doing on your phone? Stop writing! Put it down and flirt!!”

I probably should, they just got their bill, but he keeps looking and smiling.

Maybe I’m becoming more aware of the things around me and they make me uncomfortable. Not exactly sure.

I was asked to blog about a risk I took and what good came of it.I haven’t been risky enough in my life over the years.

Maybe I need to take more risks and flirt back.

Holy crap. Can I actually do that? Maybe, just maybe I have it in me.

I’m putting down the phone. And hope that the newly seated people between us don’t think I’m gazing at them.

It’s what’s behind you I’m interested in…

Those are my Random Musings and Wanderlust for today. 🙂