Ask yourself, who’s your person?


  • We all have “our person” that we go to when times are rough, indifferent, happy, sad….you get the point. Sometimes that person changes, as our lives change and move on. Some people have a time limit set on their person status, not because we don’t want them there any longer but because the course has just run out. It happens, and that’s ok. Sometimes they come into our lives in the most unexpected way and in the end we know that no matter the time, distance or whatever may come between you will always be there for each other.

    While at brunch the other day, the topic of “our person” that we go to came up. How, over time, there are people who fill that place, some move on, some remain. It sucks big time when you feel you don’t have a person. As I lamented the thought, it came to me that maybe the bigger picture is being there for yourself. Be your own person!! Why? Not sure, but it fit the moment and flow of conversation. I tend to think I can be my own person, the person at the end of the day who really is all you can count on. Seemed relatively good advice, and over the course of my life I have been told numerous times I give great advice. Advice in the sense of the word that is not truly advice, but yet more of an understanding of the issue, and I help you see your own answer. I’m a therapist without the lined pocket. There have been times I’ve wanted to shake a friend at what they are clearly missing, after blubbering the same issues time and time again, but they can’t handle the truth. In the end the dynamic of that relationship eventually filters itself in some fashion. You learn what the other can and can’t handle. Like any relationship there are limits.

    I have friends, acquaintances, and then there are a select few. Those few that know the inner workings of my complex and wonderous mind and heart. Those are my go tos, they are “my persons” The ones who can out right tell me they want to rip my hair out or smack some sense into me for slowly falling down that spiral staircase of my mind. It can get dark, sometimes lonely, and I know that I can count on myself to get out of it…but then there are those utter moments of shear “What The Fuckness” that make me wanna go stir crazy. That’s when I reach out. To the crazy ones, the ones I love, the ones I know love me for all my faults, misgivings, and as they put it… my beautiful crazy self. They get me, can be the hard ass truth with me, and know that for a moment I may want to ignore their them, but at the end of the day they have my back and would do anything for me..

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    As much as being your own person is a fantastic thing, and something I think everyone should be able to do, I also think there are moments where we do need another person to be our answer in the dark. My persons know who they are, and know I am equally theirs as well. Sounds cliche and maybe just a little crazy too, but seriously think about who your person is right now. Invest time in being your own, and also being aware of who else you have around you.

    I may have written about being comfortable in solitude in my last post,https://randommusingsandwanderlust.wordpress.com/2015/01/10/so-let-them-watch/
    but there are many wonderous things to be had with others as well. Be good to yourself, speak your truth, and take care of you.

    Those are my Random Musings and Wanderlust for today 🙂

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  • 2 thoughts on “Ask yourself, who’s your person?

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